Here’s my submission for Friday’s assignment, a elegy about fog, preferable including a metaphor. Whilst I’m not entirely convinced it counts as an elegy, it’s definitely about fog! Also, does “pockets of light”count as a metaphor? Having a brain-is-busy-sunning-itself-on-a-beach-somewhere moment! For those that don’t know, an elegy is a poem typically written about missing something, and written in elegiac couplets, where the first line is longer than the second.
I found this challenge really difficult – probably the hardest so far – so I’m pretty pleased I managed to get anything out, even if it isn’t officially an elegy! It’s about glasses fogging up as you enter a warm room, and was one of the suggestions the Daily Post gave us. It’s certainly one that I can relate to!
A sudden blindness, my vision completely obscured
Pockets of light start to appear
I feel lost, abandoned and vulnerable, a sense down
Slowly, the clouds clear
I peer through the gaps, colours and shapes materialising through the grey
Then it’s gone
Finally, reinforcements have arrived
Normality, as well as my eyesight, has been restored
As always, feel free to drop me a line in the comments with your feedback and suggestions for improvements 🙂
Although the weekend is free time for participants to catch up and generally have a break from poetry, there was an informal assignment, ‘Poetry Potluck’, encouraging us to share our favourite pieces of poetry. I’ve chosen two pieces, the first of which is ‘Steam In The Kettle’ by Charles Causley. Here’s the last verse, as it’s quite a long poem:
Fume and mist
And steam and smoke –
You never heard
A word I spoke;
But till the seven seas
Stop their flow
And the wheeling world
Is turned to snow,
I’ll ask you what
I want to know:
Where do you come from
And where do you go?
I just love the way he’s made a whole poem about something as simple as steam. I first came across it in Year 5, when I had to take an English Speaking Board exam through school. We had to memorise and perform a poem, give a presentation and read aloud a book extract, and this was the poem I chose. Unfortunately, I can remember very little of it now, pretty much just ‘Steam in the kettle, steam in the pan’…
My second choice is ‘How Can I?’ by Brian Moses. I discovered this when I chose the Oxford Book of Children’s Poetry as my school prize several years ago…it’s quite lighthearted and I think it will appeal to teenagers! However, it does make you consider how many metaphors we regularly use in real life though…
How can I wind up my brother
when I haven’t got the key?
How can I turn on my charm
when I can’t even find the switch?
How can I snap at my mother
when I’m not a crocodile?
How can I stir up my sister
when I’m not even holding a spoon?
How can I pick up my feet
and not fall to the ground on my knees?
How can I stretch my legs
when they’re long enough already?
Parents!-They ask the impossible!
– Brian Moses
Haha, I love it. If you like that poem, I would also recommend you check out ‘Granny Smith: Best Before Feb 21’ by John Corben.
Congratulations and thanks for struggling through such a long post!